I bet your husband would love to go shooting with a buddy, or play lazer tag, or just go do whatever guys do. But, no. Men are married, and they’re not allowed to leave home, or they’re bad husbands. It means that they are neglecting us as wives, and that they love their buddies more than they love us. That’s what we make them feel like.
So my husband has no one to hang out with. The men would feel guilty if they did.
Whenever I go to my “Mom’s Night Out,” my husband says, where’s the “Guy’s Night Out?” There isn’t one. Women deserve breaks, but men don’t. Women need rest, but men don’t. Men never burn out.
My other question is, why is it that men have more trouble making friends than women do? At church (not recently, but usually) someone asks me how I’m doing, and I give them a run-down on my soul, what God is teaching me, and whatever else is on my mind. I have deep spiritual conversations. I hate chit chat and dump it at the first opportunity. And yet when I overhear men talking, it’s all chit chat. No wonder they don’t know each other. No wonder they don’t hang out. It’s because they’re strangers. It’s almost like guys have to have known the other guy during their childhood to even be considered a friend. Bummer, because we don’t live where my husband grew up.
I get phone calls all the time from people who love me. I’m popular. People need me. If the phone rings, my husband says it’s for me without getting up. He’s right. This is just stupid. My husband is a great person: funny, intellectual, and spiritual. But men have their own clicks of people they grew up with. How on earth is he supposed to use his spiritual gift with other people in the body of Christ if no one ever hangs out with him? And he’s not the only one. I bet your husband feels the same way.
I just know how much my own girl friendships mean to me. My best friend has been a pillar in my life. She rebukes me when I’m sinning, she becomes outraged when I’m wronged, and she prays for me when I feel despair. Several times in my life back when I was single, I packed up all my belongings and moved to Texas, just because that’s where she was. That’s how much her friendship means to me. When she calls me to get my opinion, she knows I’ll give it. And if she disagrees with me, I don’t feel threatened in any way. I feel mentally stimulated to think about the situation from a new angle. That’s because I’m listening to her.
How many men have this? This is valuable. I think that in the body of Christ especially, it is vital. And yet we never let our husbands have the time to go escape, to breathe, to be understood as a guy. Because you know how wonderful it feels to be understood as a girl. But guys don’t need that, of course.
I’m just saying that we should encourage our men to go fishing or hiking with whatever men they feel like hanging out with. Just for the sake of friendship. Without making them feel bad. It’s worth it. Your man will come back refreshed, just like you do when you’ve had time with friends.Tweet